"I am one of you."

In class on Tuesday it was established that Bernard, the “golden child”, obtained a certain kind of charisma or skill in his ability to cohesively tell a story when compared to other characters in the text. Since then I have been noticing how a lot of other moments within the text also tie into the relationship between audience and spectator (this notion of performance was also established by Jessica’s mention of Neville’s “globe” which reminded her of the Globe Theater). In this sense, the text at times, acquires stage-like qualities. These theatrical qualities require us to define our relationship to the text as a spectator; how do we read and take in a book? Whose narration or mode of perception, as mentioned in class, do we most effortlessly relate to? I think there is a difference here between a reader who reads and a reader who watches and feels and hears, although I am still navigating the novel as a whole, I detect Woolf’s attempt to illuminate the question of what it means to watch a book in the simultaneously present of objective and subjective time.

Like Bernard, Jinny similarly thrives off the possibility of a spectator: “My peers may look at me now. I look straight back at you, men and women. I am one of you” (pg 74). In this instant of Jinny’s dance, she exemplifies her normal, almost narcissistic preoccupation with appearance and display. Unlike many other instances, however, she includes “you” instead of “them” which indicates a shift in how we have previously interacting with the character’s within the text. Instead of a more disconnected, objective party looking in we become one of her peers gazing upon her. Jinny’s decision to confront us as an audience who gazes changes the method I have been using to understand each character. Instead of criticizing Jinny for being too obsessed with appearance, I am almost in the moment of making eye contact with her- lost and simultaneously trapped in her authoritative unify by making us a the character of a “peer”. This notion of momentary oneness reminds me of the text’s diligent use of "said" instead of thought, felt or any other declaration. The repetition of "said" additionally relates to the text’s obsession with the present moment depicted through the usage of “Now” and the other present tense verbs. Said implies that someone is perhaps addressing another person in the room. There is an orality to the word said-one that requires the anticipation of a spectator or audience’s ability to see and hear rather than simply read. We're supposed to get a greater feeling of the prescence of the moment when I picture someone "saying" something. Even if they aren't really speaking I picture an exertion of energy and words entering space.  I am enjoying being taught how to see, hear, and feel words and moments; how to get lost in the moment’s senses.